its the first lap,
the beginning.

second lap, and i’m just fine,
hey life, you can throw your worries,
your tragedies, your obstacles,
they can’t hinder me.

third lap, and i’m still okay,
sticks and stones,
the chilling wind breeze,
someone’s cold whisper in my ear
can’t bring me down.

fourth lap, breaking a sweat?
routine, its becoming routine,
i can’t breathe,
and my heads spinning,
someone’s beating me,
they want me to fail,
but not now.

twentieth lap, i’m still going.
surprised?
i’m huffing and puffing,
tears in the crevices of my eyes,
stitches at my side,
cramps in my muscles,
the tightening in my heart,
i clench, and wish the pain will go away,
should i give up?
should i continue?

50th lap, and i’m running away from myself,
endless circles around and around,
i’m not surprised anymore,
give me a punch, I’ll take it,
take a stab at my heart, I’ll take it,
trample over my feelings, I’ll take it.

100th lap, and my bones are breaking,
i’m still running though,
when do i stop?
what am i chasing?
the run of my life,
has crippled me,
i have nothing now,
just these tracks and laps.

“take a deep breath,
get ready,
its the end of your run.
last lap
last time around
go.”

I hate tests. I hate finals. I hate grades. That pretty much sums it up.

Why do teachers have to give tests? There are many many reasons why they shouldn’t. I just took about 3-4 finals in the past week and I am not proud to say that I pretty much failed all of them except math.

Bio: Yep. I expect high 70s to low 80s. I studied my ass off and then she gives us questions like “Which one of these is not true?”. I regret not choosing my first answer; I felt that they were wrong so I changed them but I am pretty sure my first answers were way more logical.

Spanish Pt. 1: All multiple choice. Why does she give us questions on the culture? We’re learning the LANGUAGE not what a city is known for!!!! I hate those culture questions.

Spanish Pt. 2: I expect a 50? I left out 4/5 of the essay questions and lots of the short answer. How in the world are we supposed to answer all those questions in 40 minutes time? Impossible test.

AP World: I expect at least a 50 too. This was the most outrageous test of them all. What I studied was not on the test. What we learned was not on the test. What he told us to study was NOT on the test. Full of baloney.

Math: Got a 95. I expected a 100 but my stupid mistake cost me 5 points. What kind of test deducts FIVE points for one wrong answer. -.-

I think I spent the whole weekend moping over my low performance grades and my more-of-a-fail on my gym tests.

Here is an article to support my argument.
Nine Reasons Why Bad Grades Don’t Mean Squat

Read it or don’t read it. I know that there will be at least 50% of people who read the post and find it is idiotic and a failed and pathetic attempt at their argument. However, I did not make the post so think what you want.

You know those commercials for those “Triple-Play” or “Optimum Online” companies where there’s always a phone number that they sing? I just realized that it gets to your head. I see those commercials at least 10 times a day, and if I watched TV every single day, it adds up. Initially, I have that phone number engraved into my head. I even have that tune stuck in my head! That is definitely subliminal messaging. However, right now, I wonder how far companies are taking their scheme. In a TV show, they said that we don’t realize an image flashing for one hundredth of a second every few times throughout the commercial, but its in our minds. For example, if there’s a can of coke flashing every few seconds, or even if some one in the background is holding it in their hands, we take it all in. So its not a surprise if you suddenly think of coke-its because you saw it, unconsciously. It’s all MIND GAMES, I’m telling ya. MIND GAMES.

—

Friends unconsciously influence you too. More than you realize. In an article, I read that the more you spend time with a friend, the more in sync your menstrual cycles become. My initial reaction was a mix between amazement and a perturbed feeling?

Another study showed that if you spend more time with a thinner friend, you are likely to lose weight, as opposed to spending time with a heavier person you would gain weight. This study I can understand more. Why? Because there’s always this situation with your friends. Let’s say there’s three people eating together. In the middle of the table is that last chicken wing but no one is willing to eat that because of the fear of being considered the fat one. Another scenario is when one friend stops eating because she’s full, and it leads to a domino effect, causing the others to stop. Once again, because of the fear of being considered the pig of the group.

Lastly, I read that a friends feelings and thoughts about herself could affect how another friend feels about herself. I definitely agree with this. IT GETS TO YOU.

So what do you all think about the subliminal messages and influences. Should we avoid it or should we ignore it? Right now, I have no arguments. Actually I don’t know why I posted this-probably everyone who’s reading this already knows, but this is important to me-I guess.

Listen.

All the people out there who wear crocs. I do not know what to say. Except..that the world has ended.

Here’s a funny conversation I had on Facebook with my friend about it.
WARNING: If you like crocs, DO NOT READ THIS.

Me: don’t tell me you like crocs too… AHHHHHH! that’d be a nightmare.
Alice: OMFG, NOOOO. i hate crocs.
holyshit they are the ugliest shoes i have ever seen.
Me: WORDDDDD. i wanna kill whoever invented those, srsly. and slap some sense into them. xD
Alice: ohoh, slap them in the face with a croc!
Me: slap them in the face with a PAIR of crocs!!
Alice: LOL. we should do it together. you slap their right side & i’ll slap them on the left side!
Me: and we’ll take two more crocs. and slap each buttcheeck once.
Alice: lmfao. hellsyeah. let’s go find that person then!

END OF CONVERSATION.

Mannnnnn, I just really love that girl up there ^. She’s my wife. Haha. Anyways, this post is more of an excerpt from my life and a little peek into what goes on in my conversations with my friends, which usually turn out very weird. They also usually end up being about a completely different topic, which I have a tendency to do.

I have this friend. 

This friend is…?

I wonder if you all have a friend like this.

[NOTE: Not all of these attributes are weird/despicable/undesirable.]

Someone who:

• Looks at everyone’s buddy info in their spare time and then later comments about it to the person.
• Always comes up with derogatory comments, even when you thought there couldn’t be ANY bad comments to be made.
• Doesn’t know when to get the idea/shut-up.
• Isn’t afraid or hesitant to voice their opinion about people different from him/her, i.e. people fatter than him/her.
• Uses terms that he/she DO NOT EVEN KNOW the meaning to, which can be taken offensively if not used properly.
• Different around different people.

Now its your turn. Gimme some feedback here. Any weird things friends do? Comment. 

Gimme gimme more. Gimme gimme more. <–random.

Its a feeling that makes me all jittery and squeamish every single time I think of it. (But maybe its just me.) Last year, I watched a movie, I don’t remember if it was either with my class or my whole school, but it was “THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: PRINCE CASPIAN”. YES. One of the best movies ever, in my opinion. It made me totally space out for the next few weeks thinking about every single aspect of the movie. I replayed every single scene in my head over and over again. I just couldn’t keep my mind off of it because it was just so damn good. The reason? I have no clue whatsoever. My friends say it was the hot guys, like Ben Barnes , and William Moseley, and others say it was the screenplay, the beautiful landscape, and all those details. Both are definitely reasonable, especially this scene in the castle, when the narnians were fighting w/the EVIL PEOPLE, I was literally crying because it was so heartbreaking. Still, it made me obsessed; I would read the Narnia books, go research all the characters, and know every tidbit of information. Of course this was all a phase and when I got distracted by other things, such as school, school, AND school, I went back to my normal self. 

My current obsession is CLAMP manga, which is making me obsessed. However, I am not going to elaborate because you all are going to think I’m a psycho. Still, I love love love love love love manga, by CLAMP. (For those of you who have no idea what I am talking about…then I shall say that you are still normal human beings with a live, because when someone resorts to reading manga in their spare time, or even all the time, it means that the person has officially reached the status of “a no life”, like me.)

ANYWAYS, tell me, have you experienced this before? Or something like it? What do you think? You can answer in the comment box below. Yes; you’re all right, I’m lonely…..

Speaking of procrastination, I decided to check on google and search ‘procrastination. The first thing that pops up is this website that explains all these reasons why a person might procrastinate-going into specifics like the inability to achieve perfection or the need to achieve perfection. Wait a minute. How did you get perfection from procrastination? (RANDOM)

I admit-

-I don’t get a lot of things

-I read slowly

-I make a LOT of typing errors

-In a nutty nutshell; English is not my forte. But I like-maybe even love it. 

But (I know this grammatically is also incorrect because you can’t start a sentence with but), I will type and I will write a lot entries. Feel free to correct or point out my mistakes, spelling or grammar, but I probably won’t fix it…so yeah.

How about a little inside story of the VERY interesting life of mine (hint at sarcasm)? I was brainstorming a bunch of usernames/domain names for my new blog and was stumped. So I went to my VERY helpful friend, Kari. Her exact words, or more appropriately ‘instant message’, was “brainstorm a list of words of things you like or describe you”. And I did-I proceeded to think. Then BAMMMM. BAM. BAM. BAM. BAM. …BAM. I thought of ‘littleblueriver’ which completely describes me. Its random. I’m random. Therefore, by the transitive property of equality, littleblueriver is ME (Which doesn’t make sense at all and yet another manifestation of my randomness). Now wasn’t that a very interesting story?

Anyways, this is a blog/site-to-post-whatever-i want-whenever-i-want-website. And by anything-I mean ANYTHING. Although, I am a girl, young, and still limited in my experience. 

I will try to update as much as I can. 

And I will end it there.